Just Ridiculous

Hi guys,

in honor of the season, the list for today can be precisely described as "magical Christmas land".  And while I could have compiled 60 lands that tap for R/G, here's something much more fun:

Modern

"This will literally never work"

4 Memnite
4 Ornithopter
4 Chancellor of the Forge
4 Gitaxian Probe
4 Street Wraith
4 Serum Powder
4 Cruel Ultimatum
4 Titanic Ultimatum
4 Clarion Ultimatum
4 Brilliant Ultimatum
4 Expedition Map

4 Windbrisk Heights
1 Gemstone Caverns
4 Gemstone Mine
5 Plains
2 Flooded Strand

So what is this pile?  The deck revolves around Windbrisk Heights casting an Ultimatum effect for free.  The idea is to throw out a pile of free creatures (Ornithopter, Memnite, and the goblin from Chancellor of the Forge) and then to trigger Windbrisk Heights and hit them with a Cruel Ultimatum as early as turn two.  Titanic Ultimatum is basically 15 damage and if you gain 15 life, you might have long enough to reset the combo.  It was a toss-up between Violent Ultimatum and Clarion Ultimatum - search your library for 5 permanents you already have in plan...this could be okay to "rebuy" a Windbrisk Heights effect and would give you enough creatures to attack for lethal with titanic.  The more I thought about it, I decided that Violent Ultimatum wasn't good enough...dealing 1 damage and blowing up three permanents is definitely not going to win you the game.  Brilliant Ultimatum is clearly just trying to find more Ultimatums.

So, this deck uses the 3 sets of chaff cards to burn through cards- Gitaxian Probe, Street Wraith and Serum Powder.  Be careful when using Serum Powder, losing too many ultimatums or losing two Windbrisk Heights could be game over.

Expedition Map is simply there to look for Windbrisk Heights.

Problems?  Where do I even begin?

You only have 8 real creatures, the goblins from the chancellors are very situational.  An early removal spell from the opponent could take the wind right out of your sails.  

16 lands isn't very much mana, but theoretically, all you need is a windbrisk heights and any other lands that makes W.   You're just kidding yourself if you ever want to hardcast an Ultimatum.

There is the possibility that you might actually get to free cast an Ultimatum and then doing 15-16 damage with a titanic ultimatum isn't lethal and you don't have the resources to do it again.  Or you free roll a brilliant ultimatum, which whiffs (and you turn over 5 lands or something).  Or that you cast cruel ultimatum and your opponent discarding three cards and sacrificing a creature isn't good enough - against a deck like affinity, which can usually dump its hand turn 1-2, the discard effect might catch an etched champion and then they sacrifice an ornithopter.  

The last, most obvious and most painful possibility for failure is simply that you whiff on the windbrisk heights and you find nothing in your top four cards.

Happy holidays and may all your opening 7s be sweet ones!